Poem by Ed Miller
On countless altars I have laid
The world, and all concerning me;
Unnumbered tear-stained vows were made,
Then broken, to my agony!
How to resign? Be His at last?
Abandon self? I did not know!
‘Twas not the world that held me fast!
Surrender was my greatest foe!
Was faith to blame? Did I not seek?
What evil kept me from my quest?
Some secret sin? Was flesh too weak?
Was Satan keeping me from rest?
Must I forever rise and fall?
Is there no power to break the sway?
How often must I give my all
And take it back the very day?
I tried in vain to give Him more;
The light of hope was growing dim!
Surrender was the barrier
That kept my homesick heart from Him!
Is His arm short? Will He not hear?
Is He reluctant to receive?
Is He not ever drawing near
To grace the sinner to believe?
I could not yield; I could not die;
My spirit like the moonlight waned;
I wearied of the question, “Why?”
And o’er my life confusion reigned!
Why, if surrender was the key
To know the Lord and be made full,
Then, why the struggle to be free?
Why was it so impossible?
As blossoms drop for fruit to make
As sunshine melts the morning dew
Like darkness flees before the day;
As spring arrives to make things new;
My wilted root, by unseen Hand,
Was guided on its thirsty course,
Wending its way through barren land,
To tap at last the Living Source!
One glimpse of HIM and all the strain
And struggle did at once depart;
Those things I counted once as gain,
Appeared as rubbish to my heart!
As lovers need no influence
All rival loves to set aside,
I felt in His preeminence,
At last my heart was crucified!
Who finds the treasure counts no wealth
Too dear or difficult to give;
Who would not trade disease for health
Or give up death and choose to live?
As children gladly drop the toy
Their loving parents to embrace,
Surrender was my greatest joy
While gazing on His lovely face!
No eagle in its lofty flight
Above the world could be so free;
My soul, with effortless delight
Enjoyed the Lord with liberty!
Now HIM I seek! Not, how to give,
Deny, or mammon to forsake!
For me, to know Him is to live!
Surrender follows in the wake!
(This poem can be found in Ed Miller’s book of poetry “Green Pastures” which can be viewed and/or downloaded from biblestudyministriesinc.com)